So...I have had the bubble guts all day and after a couple hours of crossing my legs to hold in the poots I decided it was finally time to give birth. Initially, I just went into my work floor's bathroom thinking it would be quick and painless. After a few nastay stanky poots I figured this called for a visit to a different floor. -1 is the place I go because my nastay poos can be anonymous, where I can just make all the noises I want, and no one will be able to link the stench to me. So I hiked up my skirt, held my gut and hoped I didn't let out anymore poots on my way down to my safe haven. When I got there, I quickly scanned the stalls for feet, I was safe. I started to let out the most rank poots and green little baby poos compliments of my kale smoothie from earlier. After about ten minutes of poo heaven I felt like 5 pounds lighter, no more baby belly. I immediately sent the Poo Princess an email and told her of my adventures. She was pleased.
(And I am!)
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