Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Pretty Girl and Her Pretty Terrible Stench

Dear Potty,

So...I have had the bubble guts all day and after a couple hours of crossing my legs to hold in the poots I decided it was finally time to give birth.  Initially, I just went into my work floor's bathroom thinking it would be quick and painless.  After a few nastay stanky poots I figured this called for a visit to a different floor.  -1 is the place I go because my nastay poos can be anonymous, where I can just make all the noises I want, and no one will be able to link the stench to me.  So I hiked up my skirt, held my gut and hoped I didn't let out anymore poots on my way down to my safe haven.  When I got there, I quickly scanned the stalls for feet, I was safe.  I started to let out the most rank poots and green little baby poos compliments of my kale smoothie from earlier.  After about ten minutes of poo heaven I felt like 5 pounds lighter, no more baby belly.  I immediately sent the Poo Princess an email and told her of my adventures.  She was pleased.

(And I am!)

Send more stories! :)

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